Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Why now?

Hello you! Some people would probably be asking why, after all these years, I finally decided to advertise my blog. Well, for the lack of better words, I grew some balls. I sort out my feelings and thoughts about different topics through written words. These words are very near and dear to my heart and it took a long time to be comfortable with the idea that they may be criticized. You may notice that I don't write about 'happy' things, I may from time to time, however, writing is a vessel to deal with the 'unhappy' things in life. When I feel sad, I write about it and move on. It's almost like therapy. I hope you enjoy what I have written so far.

"Sometimes it takes facing something terrible to find the strength that lies within" -Alexandra Bazile :)

Promises by Alexandra Bazile

Did I do something wrong?
Did I hurt him in any way?
Was he right?
Did I deserve it?

In sickness and in health,
For better or for worse...
Worse...
Can it be worse?

He loves me.
He truly loves me.
Doesn't he?
Shouldn't he?

We promised.
I promised.
Until death do us part,
Wasn’t that our vow?

No more name calling,
No more cruel jokes,
No more ‘stupid’, ‘ugly’ or ‘fat’,
He promised.

He promised it would be the last one,
The last blow.
"No more," he said.
No more hurting, no more bruises, no more pain.

Tomorrow will be better,
I will be better.
He promised.
We promised.

© October 20, 2011, Alexandra Bazile

A cry for help

Why is all this happening?
Why does life have to be so hard?
They say follow your dreams and follow your heart,
Has my heart steered me wrong?

I try to go down a path of righteousness,
Praise the Lord for all my blessings,
But day after day, the world seems to collapse around me.
Where all others strive, I keep falling.

For every step I make, I’m being pulled back.
For every breath I take, suffocation ensues.
Will this pain cease?
Will this void leave?

I am nothing but an empty shell,
Void of emotion,
Lost in a sea of despair and isolation
Nothing but a broken bell.

I scream but no one can hear me
I cry but no one can see me
I matter to no one but myself
But even she has given up on me

I hope for new beginnings,
For times of joyous tidings,
For a turning of the tide,
Where love and happiness resides.

© June 20, 2012, Alexandra Bazile